Thoughts on the Journey

Today, marginaliana asked for What's your favorite or most important symbol and why is it meaningful for you?

For this answer, I really wish I had all my icons as I actually have an icon of the symbol that means a lot to me.



In Maori art, koru connects the past and the present. When I was in New Zealand, this symbol made sense to me in terms of beginnings and endings and how you can't always tell when you're starting and when you're ending and that every ending is a beginning. I had a chance to walk through a New Zealand rainforest and seen tree ferns with korus bigger than me and its stuck with me. I wish New Zealand wasn't so far away because I would love to live there again.

As I'm getting ready for another beginning and working on grasping every start I can find, this curling symbol of life waiting and ready resonates. Its hard to find just one other image to capture the glorious koru but I finally chose one.



From my trip, I have a greenstone koru necklace that I love wearing. Whenever I wear it, I feel stronger as I remember that I went to New Zealand with a visa, one connection through my mother and the company that helped me get the visa. From there I spent a year supporting myself and then went back for grad school, as I get ready for another move, I remind myself of that. My toxic job left some scars but I made my way in New Zealand and that is within me.

December meme is over here

I really like Boston. I keep walking around and thinking of other cities that I've lived and worked in and loved. Its wonderful to be able to see friends and wander into amazing bookstores and places like the aquarium. Tomorrow I'm going to talk to my job agency and see what ideas they have for getting me closer to moving here. I know its not going to be easy but I can do this and there's an opening at the Boston Public library that I'm going to apply for.

Being here, I'm having this weird mixture of emotion. The main one is I could fit here and the other is my self doubt. I know what I can do and that I'll be able to do more in a place with all these options. Also I know that I'll do better when I have friends who are nearby to talk to and be around.

The last time I was in Boston was as part of a marching band trip and its been fascinating to go back to places that I remember. I like how easy Boston is to walk and the T has even been fairly nice to me. My 7 day pass decided to stop working and there's only one store, so I'll deal with that tomorrow but its easy to get around. Today I picked up Seanan McGuire's newest book which I'll probably read in one or two sittings, I tend to do that with her books. Life is good and I think I can see where my road is heading next.

Two of the horoscopes I read gave me two phrases that keep going through my head as I walk around and plan-'not empty but open' and 'your instincts are glittering and sharp, use them'.

There's something about Porn Battle that always gets me writing. The deadline and prompts that make me willing to take on fandoms that I love but have never written clicks for me. Its going on this week and I've already written my fic, which is also my first one in the Vorkosigan fandom. This is a heads up that as I write these fics, I'll be posting here and on my Tumblr. And there's some job stuff that's making me feel hopeful as I'm planning a trip to Boston in the middle of April.

Living in Now (382 words) by FiKate
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Simon Illyan/Alys Vorpatril
Characters: Simon Illyan, Alys Vorpatril
Additional Tags: New Relationship, Memory Loss, Politics, Breasts
Summary:

Written for Porn Battle Prompt Stack and the prompt: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold, Alys/Simon, discovery, new, power, remembered.

After Ivan discovers Alys and Simon during Memory, Simon realizes how being with her has him living more in the present as he still struggles with what he doesn't know.

Day 09

In your own space, set some goals for the coming year. They can be fannish or not, public or private. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

I like the phrasing of this, goals not resolutions as there are certain things I'm reaching for and writing them down helps.

1-Write and publish more-fics, on my librarian blog and keep looking into ways to write in other places.

2-Move to a city either Boston or DC-this one is something I've been thinking about and I think will make a big difference in many of parts of my life. Its going to involve finding the equivalent of the subbing I've been doing here, a bridge job as my mom calls them, but being closer to friends, people my age and more of what's happening in the profession will be good for me in a lot of ways.

3-Comment more, get involved in discussions all over the web in fannish and librarian places. I have a voice to add to the conversation.

4-Read books outside my comfort zone, read more diverse authors and stories.

5-Keep reconnecting more with the theater world.

I'm slowly getting things accomplished as I think about all that happened at Chessiecon and where I want to be next. I'm working on getting myself out of where I am now and to a place where I'm living near friends. There are jobs out there, its a matter of getting in the door and being the right fit.

In the meantime, I've written up a new blog post about the films I saw at the Rehoboth Beach Film Festival and I'm going to do an in depth one for Chessiecon.

I also wanted to remind everyone that I love sending out cards and if you'd like one or your address has changed, let me know here. All comments on there are screened and if you don't want a card but instead want a fic or also want a fic, let me know.

My Yuletide and Treat fic are both going along, the ideas are there its just getting the words to work.

At the moment, I feel sick but there are some hopeful job things happening in the near future. I'm trying to put myself out there in terms of ALA and I'm happy with my Yuletide. I think this year I might write a Treat for the first time.

What I finished reading

Carry On by Rainbow Rowell. I love Rowell's books and Carry On was fantastic as she really understands what it is about the Chosen One stories and fantasy that draw people in and how to turn it all on its head. This is a book about two boys who take control of their story even though the story isn't encouraging them to and their friends who are along with them. I would recommend this book to everyone who loves Harry Potter and Percy Jackson, but wishes for more.

What I'm currently reading

The Sword of Summer by Rick Riordan. I always enjoy Riordan's books and this one isn't disappointing, he's got a great ear for dialogue, action and how kids behave. I appreciate that he's gotten much better about putting diversity into his casts and understanding that diversity covers a wide range from being homeless to being Deaf.

The Ghost Bride by Yangsze Choo. At this point, I'm not terribly far into this book and I'm not completely sure how I feel about it. I enjoy the setting and the main character has a good voice but so far, she seems fairly passive. I'm hoping more will happen as so far, there's not much of a conflict or romance, but I like the author's style.

What I'm reading next

One of the books I'm reading next is for Yuletide so I'm not going to list it but I'm looking forward to it. I love writing for other people and how Yuletide always ends up stretching my sense of what I think I can write. I also have the newest Jonathan Stroud Lockwood and Company book to read, which should be fun and creepy. The Rehoboth Film Festival is coming up next week, so far this year I'm not seeing a huge amount of films, I know there will be one or two that really stick with me. Now I think its time for more tea.

I've been being lazy today after two weeks of fact checking and interviews. Its so nice to be able to sit and just read without worrying about various deadline. I do have some fic exchanges coming up, but that's a different kind of pressure.

I just reread Brothers in Arms as part of my plan to play Ivan Vorpatril more and now I'm thinking about tossing a younger Ivan into the sandboxes. All the layers in Miles' narration about him, how its clear he trusts him, knows he's smart and lazy and I think at times sees more of Ivan than Ivan does, just like Ivan is good at reading Miles in ways that Miles isn't comfortable with are intriguing. This book has scenes of Elli and Ivan alongside Miles and their relationships are clearly mirrored, but how they got there isn't the same. I also find the issues of Miles and his identity fascinating and how in this one, he uses that to try and help Mark. I'm not sure if I want to reread Mirror Dance as while its good, some of the most brutal parts of the series are in there, at least violent. Perhaps if I have Memory on hand for after that would work since that's more about healing.

ETA: I've put an Ivan from after Brothers in Arms up in PFSB and Mixed Muses and I need to update his profile.

For the first time ever, someone podficced one of my fics: [podfic] we're having tea (5 words) by croissantkatie
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Old Kingdom - Garth Nix
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Ellimere (Old Kingdom), Prince Sameth
Additional Tags: Family, Podfic & Podficced Works, Podfic Length: 0-10 Minutes, Audio Format: MP3
Summary:

On a rainy day, Ellimere decides she and Sameth are having tea. Set post-canon in this moment, Ellimere and Sameth work towards rebuilding their relationship.

Its wonderful to know that someone else likes my words enough to do something with them.

This week I've also dived headlong into Sense 8, which hit me right in the feels. I finished watching it, watched the behind the scenes' show and then started a rewatch. I mean I did watch other things but it worked for me. Its far from perfect, I wish the stories had been a little more balanced but I loved how it was clear that each country was almost another genre and how everyone intersected. I wish I could remember who first pointed out that the feel of each country and Senseate plot fits where they're from, because its so true. The music was glorious and while the plot was weird with some points of huh, perhaps those will be answered in the second season. Rewatching, I'm able to see how some parts fit together which is nice. Overall, I just love that the heart of it is people connecting and reaching out to help and be there.

This week I wrote up a new cover letter for a job opportunity that feels like it came out of nowhere. I won't know anything more until August but I feel good about it and my paycheck for my last fact-checking came in.

AU!Week in Milliways was interesting and makes me think I should go and revisit the Pacific Rim AU I was working on for Sameth and maybe write up more of if William went down a darker path. Its something that's come up in other stories for him but I haven't pushed it to the point I did in Bar. Its something I might play with more in the sandboxes.

In happy news for the first time, I participated in the Lost Library Exchange where the focus is on writing fictional works that are mentioned in other works. Its a great idea and there were some amazing stories. I wrote one which is a chapter from one of the Millie books from the Chronicles of Chrestomanci.

When Millie Played Fair (1571 words) by FiKate
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Millie Goes to School Series
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Millie (Millie Goes to School series)
Additional Tags: Boarding School, Millie Goes to School (Fictional Series), Female Friendship, Music
Summary:

Miss Heloise had organized a piano concert and Millie was going to do her best and win a prize, nothing Delphinia could do would stop her. A chapter from Millie in the Upper Fourth.

“She’s always showing off but she can’t do that much on the piano, she’s not that good. Now come on, I need to finish this essay or else I won’t be allowed to ride in the race next month,” Jane said with a sigh, Millie knew it was only to distract her but she didn’t mind. She knew she was lucky to have Jane as her roommate, because she understood about Delphinia and never thought she was making anything up, even though Jane didn’t care one whit about music or who was best except in riding.

For a gift, I received a brilliant fic from the world of Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, and I've finally seen the first episode of the miniseries, it looks good. I look forward to when I can watch all of it along with rereading as its one of my favorite books.

On Doorways, Glass, and my Good Wife (1035 words) by Selden
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell - Susanna Clarke
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Characters: Revelations of Thirty-Six Other Worlds - Paris Ormskirk
Additional Tags: Horror, marital discord, unfortunate housekeeping solutions, Period-Typical Sexism
Summary:

A fresh addition to the excellent work Revelations of Thirty-Six Other Worlds, devised by Paris Ormskirk, gent, and newly imprinted at London, by William Knowles, in Paul's Churchyard at the sign of the black bird, 1547.

Then I also got a wonderful treat of a review of an Ariadne Oliver novel.

Book Review: The Affair of the Second Goldfish (229 words) by Lexigent
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Poirot - Agatha Christie
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Reviews of Ariadne Oliver novels
Summary:

A review of this entertaining new novel.

Some of the other great stuff was actually written by people I know like bookelfe's Romeo and Ethel the Pirate Daughter.

( Two more recs here but everything in the exchange is worth a read. )

This day has been good then awful. I had lunch with my brother and niece, read the paper and went to turn on my laptop and it didn't work. I troubleshooted but a stupid spill last night didn't make it happy. At least in the phone, the help desk guy was understanding. I just feeling thrown off. So tomorrow I go to the nearest Apple Store and try not to fret too much. I know I can manage but I'll be traveling soon and my life seems full of waiting and hoping at the moment. This is just one more thing to worry about.

Since I was in a book mood, I read a wonderful romance novel called Three Weeks with Lady X and now I'm having a late dinner. I'll be happy to know what's going on tomorrow but for now will be slow on my threads.

I'm having a quiet week since due to when the school break is, I won't be substituting at all. That's given me time to get to work on a number of things I've been meaning to do and have the time to finish up some reading.

Today I signed up to write a review for Smart Bitches, Trashy Books. I love looking through the RITA nominees and then seeing what I can find at the library. In an annoying twist, the books that really caught my eye weren't at the library but they just add to my to-read list.

I also signed up to do some volunteering with one of the library associations with, I hope that helps me in terms of reaching out. Its something I've been wanting to do more of, but I needed to get a little braver. I'm waiting on hearing from a school, so the busier I am the better. It feels like there are doors opening and I only need one place to say, yes, we want you. I did my taxes today which were simple, that was nice and now they're done and I've sorted a lot of books to go the library book sale. My other main goal for myself this week other than the sorting and taxes is to finish a fic and post it.

That reminds me, one of the ARCs, I picked up in Chicago was for To Hold the Bridge by Garth Nix. I know a lot of people on my circle/flist read him and I'd love to pass it on to someone who will enjoy it. Comment here and we can figure out how to get it to you.

Now for the books that have been happily filling my time.
What I finished reading

Only Enchanting by Mary Balogh, this book is part of her Survivor's Club series which focuses on a group who were all wounded in various ways during the Napoleonic Wars. They're brought together by a noble who lost his son and opened his estate to all of them to heal. The series starts six or so years after they all returned and now they're mainly healed and meet annually at the same estate. I adore this series and Balogh's writing, because all the characters have depth, she shows different sides of the Regency world and all of the endings feel earned. This one is particularly interesting as the hero suffered major head trauma so he has missing parts of his memories and doesn't always feel in control. I liked how she dealt with his challenges and the romance was complex and fascinating.

I also finished my reread of Passage by Connie Willis and my parents are currently reading it. I always enjoy her writing because of how they remind me of my favorite mysteries, strong characters, a plot that pulls me in with the addition of something more.

What I'm reading now

Shadow Scale by Rachel Hartman and this is an amazing book. I love how the story and the world has grown bigger since Seraphina and the challenges that face her.

The Seneca Falls Inheritance by Miriam Grace Monfredo which is interesting. Its a mystery about a librarian set not long before the Seneca Falls Confederation and the main character is a friend of Elizabeth Cady Stanton. The writing is good, the author brings in many aspects of what it means for the main character to be a single woman and how she fits into the town. So far the mystery isn't that gripping which is why I keep putting it down and picking it back up again.

What I'm reading next

Yesterday at the library, I picked up Night Watch as its been a while since I reread it. Other than that, I'm not sure, my to-read pile is always daunting and challenging.