A little breakdown
Sep. 28th, 2012 06:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
My host, who has been wonderful told me tonight that she'd like me to leave and I made a reservation with an extended stay hotel after breaking down crying. I'm having a bit of hindsight because honestly trying to find a place to live, while starting a new job is hard and takes time. Extended stay was probably what I should have done in the first place but she offered and it has been nice, weird but nice. I'm going to head out tomorrow, which will mean that I will have a proper space of my own, which will be amazing. I think I've been craving that. Also the hotel is actually within walking distance of the school, which will make a lot of things a lot easier. I still haven't heard from the realtor about the place I wanted and moving as I go look just feels right. Its just I had a bad moment of crying as she said I want you out by Wednesday. I understand her feeling, she didn't expect a guest for this long, but well, I've tried to leave a very small footprint. And at this point, its a week over a month. Tonight I'll do some packing, I haven't unpacked that much, so pretty easy and haul my stuff into my car tomorrow. Who knows, I might be out of here by lunchtime as I keep waking up early even when I want to sleep in.
I just feel kind of worn out even though things are going well, because there's always something and for all the good, there are points of feeling that I can't find my feet. Even to just be in a hotel that's more neutral and won't go away won't make me feel as pressed to find a place. As my mom reminded me, usually when a place hires you and relocates you, they give you more time to get settled. I was rushed over and haven't had that much time to catch my breath and its been getting to me. I know I haven't been sleeping or eating as well I really should be and I can feel it.
Though there is a lot of good, today just felt like all of it came together in a rush. I had another meeting of the RP club and was reminded how teenage boys all like being the hero, but I was able to manage their character ideas into ones where everyone has more of a chance. A teacher sent a student down for my help, which was good but warning would have been nicer. This is the same Spanish teacher who suddenly appeared with a class, I'm glad she trusts me but would prefer warning. And then next week I'm going to be teaching classes for a science teacher and I feel like my ideas are coming together. My plans to connect with the IT guys kind of fell through, which is annoying. I'd really like their help in terms of working out the state of computers and various tech at the school as its done rather piecemeal.
I wrote some FicFriday stories and am still taking them but I think I'll post them later when I'm not feeling quite so shaky.
I just feel kind of worn out even though things are going well, because there's always something and for all the good, there are points of feeling that I can't find my feet. Even to just be in a hotel that's more neutral and won't go away won't make me feel as pressed to find a place. As my mom reminded me, usually when a place hires you and relocates you, they give you more time to get settled. I was rushed over and haven't had that much time to catch my breath and its been getting to me. I know I haven't been sleeping or eating as well I really should be and I can feel it.
Though there is a lot of good, today just felt like all of it came together in a rush. I had another meeting of the RP club and was reminded how teenage boys all like being the hero, but I was able to manage their character ideas into ones where everyone has more of a chance. A teacher sent a student down for my help, which was good but warning would have been nicer. This is the same Spanish teacher who suddenly appeared with a class, I'm glad she trusts me but would prefer warning. And then next week I'm going to be teaching classes for a science teacher and I feel like my ideas are coming together. My plans to connect with the IT guys kind of fell through, which is annoying. I'd really like their help in terms of working out the state of computers and various tech at the school as its done rather piecemeal.
I wrote some FicFriday stories and am still taking them but I think I'll post them later when I'm not feeling quite so shaky.
no subject
Date: 2012-09-28 10:52 pm (UTC)Oh, Fi. I hope having the space to yourself, not to mention the reduced stress and privacy, will help. I wish I could help out somehow! I'm sending so many good thoughts, though. Soon things will be settled; it sounds like you're already valued at your job, which is proof of what an amazing person and mind you are. Hang in there, and please take care of yourself.
*feeds you chicken soup and tea and tucks you away someplace safe*
♥
no subject
Date: 2012-09-28 10:56 pm (UTC)Even when I was in New Zealand and trying to find my feet, I did have my own room in hostels and hotels. This while kind in the end was just a more complicated offer.
I hope I'm valued, its sometimes hard to tell.
no subject
Date: 2012-09-28 10:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-09-28 11:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 12:08 am (UTC)Seems like you really have been wanting your own space though, so in that sense, I'm happy for you. It seems like ultimately, this is a good step. <3333
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Date: 2012-09-29 12:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 01:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 01:20 am (UTC)Her offer was wonderful but clearly everything took longer, having my own space to breath and plan, I think will actually help me find someplace.
no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 01:32 am (UTC)Sometimes life does that to you, thrust you into new situations I mean. You learn adapt and make the best of it.
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Date: 2012-09-29 02:25 am (UTC)I'm glad the teachers at the school are feeling comfortable with sending you students, because that does show trust; while warning would be nice, don't be afraid to be proactive perhaps and offer help at dedicated times, so that they get the hint that a little bit of scheduling might be useful?
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Date: 2012-09-29 02:30 am (UTC)Well, at this point I'm just in the library so I'm good with working with students and will be helping in classes next week. I think I do need to talk to this particular Spanish teacher about giving me a little more warning.
no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 02:39 am (UTC)I didn't realize that the housing was something that the school was offering to set up for you. I thought that it was just something they were helping out with but not that they were obligated to do, I misunderstood I guess. If you continue to have no luck with this realtor I would offer some advice of looking on your own, you'd likely be able to find a place rather quickly with some good searching. I really like the website 'hotpads.com', it's got good search parameters.
no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 02:44 am (UTC)When I moved out here, I had very little warning and went eek, please help me have someplace to stay. I was given the job offer on a Thursday and the next Thursday next staff orientation started. I drove out on Monday, arrived on Tuesday night and was able to stay here, which was a godsend. My host volunteered, but I think it hadn't been thought through just how hard it is to find a new place while adjusting to a new job.
The realtor recommended looking on craigslist and I've looked at various apartment sites as well, because the realtor's specialty is houses. I'm in an area where there are just lots of little neighborhoods and I'm not sure about the turnover, which makes it tricky. It was really easy to find places in Ann Arbor but this area's just more confusing.
no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 02:49 am (UTC)And I didn't realize the realtor was working as a favor, that explains more why they haven't been more communicative, perhaps. You're in Royal Oak, right? What are you looking at as far as size and price?
no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 02:53 am (UTC)Basically I'm looking for someplace in Royal Oak or Birmingham that's near one of the downtowns with some space, a covered garage and easy laundry acces. I can afford up to 1000 a month and a little over if need be.
I think the realtor means well, but I'm not his priority.
no subject
Date: 2012-09-29 03:03 am (UTC)http://www.showmetherent.rentlinx.com/Property.aspx?PropertyID=61160
No garage, but walking distance to downtown:
http://listings.listhub.net/pages/REALCOMPMI/212098650/?channel=hotpads
This one possibly too, two car garage!
http://www.kw.com/homes-for-sale/48073/MI/Royal-Oak/4413-Elmwood-Avenue/3yd-KW-101_212092071.html
Those are just a few that I found via hotpads. Hopefully something works out for you soon, in the mean time you can get out tomorrow and have your space in the extended stay and that should be good for you to decompress a little, I think. :)
no subject
Date: 2012-09-30 05:08 pm (UTC)Hope you get it sorted, sounds like it got sprung on you.
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Date: 2012-09-30 06:06 pm (UTC)