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Just Keep Going
Feb. 20th, 2011 03:33 pmThis weekend has been very mixed for me, but I think I'm in a better place now. I just sent out tons of emails to various people in hopes that I can late add a graduate English course on graphic novels and get my internship credits sorted. If no one else is going to tell me what next then I'll figure it out myself. My life's going to end up a lot busier soon if I do get this added class but hopefully it will help me graduate. It looks like picking up a course halfway won't be happening. I had a feeling that would be trickier and I can't seem to find these mysterious half semester courses in the things I want to study.
Blah, I really dislike this because I hate being the student who's going, help can you add me in? This feels like more of Michigan going, you can figure it out yourself and we don't care if you feel stupid doing it. Though that's not true, my favorite prof is helping me out and I feel comfortable asking her for help.
One thing I hadn't mentioned before that makes me feel so odd is I hadn't started job searching yet, I kind of felt like I didn't want to until I was sure I was graduating. I hate that turned out to be true. One more week and then I get a break.
At the moment this is my life, trying to sort out courses and remind myself that I'm not failing. What's tricky is how this connects back to the last time I was working on a masters and that's why it terrifies me so much.
For those of you who have just started following this journal this year. I lived in New Zealand for three years and during the last two years I was in Wellington at the University of Victoria working on a masters in Classics. The first year was coursework and I ended up getting a Bachelor of Honours from it and then the second year I was writing a thesis on Pindar's odes. That thesis went on longer than I planned from an academic year to an entire year and it wasn't until I went home that I was willing to say, this isn't going to happen. It made me feel like an utter failure and as if I'd disappointed everyone.
This mess brings that up and the fact that I keep hearing shoulds from people just brings that back, should have done this earlier, should have looked before without following up with well yes, but what can I do? I'm probably going to keep writing about this until it gets solved and sadly I have no idea when that will be.
Blah, I really dislike this because I hate being the student who's going, help can you add me in? This feels like more of Michigan going, you can figure it out yourself and we don't care if you feel stupid doing it. Though that's not true, my favorite prof is helping me out and I feel comfortable asking her for help.
One thing I hadn't mentioned before that makes me feel so odd is I hadn't started job searching yet, I kind of felt like I didn't want to until I was sure I was graduating. I hate that turned out to be true. One more week and then I get a break.
At the moment this is my life, trying to sort out courses and remind myself that I'm not failing. What's tricky is how this connects back to the last time I was working on a masters and that's why it terrifies me so much.
For those of you who have just started following this journal this year. I lived in New Zealand for three years and during the last two years I was in Wellington at the University of Victoria working on a masters in Classics. The first year was coursework and I ended up getting a Bachelor of Honours from it and then the second year I was writing a thesis on Pindar's odes. That thesis went on longer than I planned from an academic year to an entire year and it wasn't until I went home that I was willing to say, this isn't going to happen. It made me feel like an utter failure and as if I'd disappointed everyone.
This mess brings that up and the fact that I keep hearing shoulds from people just brings that back, should have done this earlier, should have looked before without following up with well yes, but what can I do? I'm probably going to keep writing about this until it gets solved and sadly I have no idea when that will be.
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