(no subject)

[ceitfianna]

Sorry for not being around today, it was long, lots of time around Rehoboth Beach in various places so the heat plus walking in parks and in town wore me out. Tomorrow I will try to be on and I was wondering, how do you exorcise an ex or just your own thoughts that drag you down?

I gained some weight after my first year in New Zealand and I keep trying to shed it but at this point in my life, job is priority and I don't plan on being in Lewes for too long, so I don't want to take a class I might drop.

Then there's this voice in my head that goes, no, Kate, you're fat and ugly, which one of my exes sort of set there. I hate this and I keep trying to put things in perspective. I'm healthy, I have a wonderful life and when I have my own place and have the time to focus, I will join an Y or something and take dance classes, walk more and get me back to where I want.

I just hate this little voice that this ex planted in my head which didn't used to be there saying, no, if I don't look like this, I'm not pretty. Thanks for listening, I just needed to write this since today was good and complicated, I have a pretty shirt to wear under my suit for job interviews and just complicated thoughts. *hugs flist*

I'll be alright, promise, just self doubt is all and tomorrow I get a rushin_doll.

Comments

[vivien]

Those little voices are quite vexing. It sounds like you are doing well with not listening to them overly much. *hugs*

[ceitfianna]

I try just ever once in a while, they get louder than I like.