I feel like an idiot.

[ceitfianna]

It turns out that getting those extra internship credits isn't easy and now I have the registrar going, why didn't you do this early at me?

Because I didn't know I had to isn't a good enough answer.

I just hate this, because I've been working hard and trying my best to keep things sorted and I've failed miserably.

What is it about this place that can take me so high and so low all at once? Maybe I'm just not self-propelled enough for Michigan. I like having mentors who help me figure out what I need to make sure I'm doing and thwap me to make sure I don't forget things.

Comments

[spooky-lemur.livejournal.com]

Maybe it's the differences in the systems from here and New Zealand?

[ceitfianna]

Or even the small school I went in for undergrad. I just hate this.

[spooky-lemur.livejournal.com]

I hope the folks you're speaking with are at least treating you like a person. *hugz*

[ceitfianna]

They are, I just feel like a disappointment.

[spooky-lemur.livejournal.com]

Whom are you disappointing? I would imagine they see this a lot so don't be so hard on yourself. = D

[ceitfianna]

Myself, my parents and no one's given me the impression that this happens a lot. I feel like the behind SI student who didn't catch this earlier. I know people have talked about having issues with the fact we don't really have advisors, but no one's mentioned having the same problems.

I'm probably overthinking this but I just hate this feeling of not knowing how to navigate this. And that for every thing I do, another one doesn't work.

[in-the-blue.livejournal.com]

There's always a way. You just haven't found it yet.

[ceitfianna]

I hope I can find it.

[in-the-blue.livejournal.com]

You don't have to find it yourself. If your answer as to why you didn't do it sooner is because you didn't know you had to, then there's a flaw in the system somewhere, and it's your advisor's job to help you navigate the system and find the way. One of the most common mistakes is in thinking that there's nobody to help, but Michigan (like every school) has a staff there to provide assistance. If one person isn't knowledgeable enough, have them point you to someone else, and someone else again, and someone else until you find someone who can do what they're supposed to do.

Being self-propelled is one thing, and you are, you discovered a problem and are trying to solve it. But nothing says you have to be capable of knowing how to do things you don't know how to do. Take it all the way to the head of your department if need be! You'll find someone who can do their job.

[ceitfianna]

The problem is I don't have a consistent advisor, that's why it took so long for me to find out what I was missing.

The internship stuff is covered by one group of people and they helped me with this plan and I emailed the person who told me it should work for her help.

I'm still trying to figure out the second part of needing another class and I've sent out some emails asking for help on that. I just haven't heard back yet. Hopefully one of these emails will yield something.

[spooky-lemur.livejournal.com]

Sorry if that question seemed callous or anything, I didn't mean it that way.

I can understand you feelings and I hope everything gets sorted. At least you won't make this mistake again right?

[ceitfianna]

No, it didn't seem callous at all. This is just dredging up when I couldn't finish my masters thesis in Wellington.

Also I'm always harder on myself than I probably need to be. The hope is that after I figure this all out, I can graduate and not have to deal with graduate school again.

[spooky-lemur.livejournal.com]

Okay. I just realized on the reread that it might have been taken that way.

[ceitfianna]

No, you're fine. *hugs* Today just sucks.

[bigfluffball.livejournal.com]

The university are the ones who are stupid, letting you get into this mess. You pay them to teach you towards getting a degree.

*hugs lots* Most things can be fixed though, so hang in there.

[ceitfianna]

Thank you. I just keep going forward and hope something works out.